The art of flirting does not come easy to everyone, I have seen men that have trouble speaking to women in a flirtatious yet conversational way. After many studies have been conducted and witnessing many clients in action, I realized it is because so many men have “canned” questions, which does not allow for the art of flirting to take place! They are not acting as themselves, and are trying to be someone they are not. Once they ask all their prepared questions, they no longer no what to say. If they took a moment and really listened to what the woman was saying, they would have had many questions to ask her. Flirting is about being intrigued with the conversation. If you find something interesting, you automatically want to learn more about it. If you pay attention to what the woman you are interested in is saying, you will want to learn more about her, and therefore the questions will begin flowing. Remember, this is NOT an interview, so don’t make her think she is applying for a job here!
Don’t get me wrong, I am a big advocate for preparing questions. Sometimes when we are nervous, our minds go blank and we forget what to say after the opening line. I always tell me clients to prepare 5 questions and 5 follow up questions. Have these questions memorized so that you can pull them out when you are at a loss for words. Once you ask a question that a woman is passionate about, you will notice the woman speak more in depth about the topic. JACKPOT! This means she is more interested in this specific topic. Continue this conversation and ditch your canned questions for now, but always keep them on standby for back up. Finding a topic that interests her will help her feel more comfortable with you and will also spark the fire of attraction (AKA-Flirting shall begin)!
Why do most women have so many girlfriends?
Because we love to talk and vent about our feelings. So, be the man in our life that we can talk to. When you tune us out and stick to your list of prepared question, we notice that you are not truly listening to us. Why would we waste our time talking with someone who does not truly care? Also, when there is no flow in the questions, the conversation will feel very forced.
AND…WE HATE FORCED CONVERSATIONS!
This leads me to my most important piece of advice when entering into a flirtatious conversation with women. LISTEN!
You do not always have to have a question prepared. When you sit back and listen to what she is saying, many times the questions will just flow naturally. Pretend she is telling you a comic book story or predicting the ending to the 2018 Super Bowl championship. Listen with intention and you will notice the conversation picking up and she will be more turned on by you. If she was reading into the future and about to tell you who is going to win the 2018 super bowl, wouldn’t you be very interested? Wouldn’t you have so many questions? Wouldn’t you be amazed at how she knew this?
Bring all this excitement to the conversation even though unfortunately it will most likely never have to do with her predicting the future of football. 🙁
*Keep conversation flowing
*Find her passions