Top Five Red Flags on the First Date
Finally getting a date can be awesome. It’s a new step from just talking via Tinder or social media or text. It shows that the guy you’re into is willing to initiate something further and deeper between you two. But not every first date is full of sparks and laughs and fireworks. There are some definite red flags that you should always watch out for before you get stuck on this guy.
He Doesn’t Seem to Have Any Idea What He’s Doing… And He’s Fine With That
The generation easing itself into adulthood right now is the Millennials. No longer can you work a part-time job and afford to get yourself through four years of college. Work can be more difficult to get by when you don’t have the proper experience. The problem arises when you are unwilling to attain that experience or you just give up and decide getting a job isn’t worth it anyways. If you’re on a date with someone who fits that picture, it’s not a good idea to stick with them. This is a first date red flag. Your date needs to get their priorities in order. They should be able to support themselves. If he’s relying on his parents and family to pay his bills or— even worse— he lives with his parents, you should scoot. You’re going to be the one paying for restaurant dates, Starbucks coffee for two, and movie tickets in the future. Yeah, he’ll have a lot of time on his hands, but that is not a good tradeoff at all.
He Shames the Server or Complains About the Taxi Driver
People in the service industry are hard workers. Their jobs are important, but more than that… They are important. If your date shows up already looking aggravated and complaining that the taxi driver didn’t have change for a $20 or didn’t go the way he wanted the driver to go, this could be a first date red flag. This shows that he gets easily angered towards people and doesn’t do well during events that are perhaps slightly stressful. Everyone knows that first dates are stressful. But you’re meeting someone you thought was wonderful for the first time in a romantic situation. So what’s the reason for blowing up because the server brought a regular Coke instead of a diet on? This is a serious first date red flag because if he doesn’t do well under good stress circumstances, he isn’t likely to handle extremely stressful situations any better.
Your Views Obviously Don’t Mesh
He doesn’t believe transwomen are actual women. He thinks Trump is the best president ever. He doesn’t agree with medicinal marijuana legalization. If he says anything that makes you start questioning whether your beliefs may not line up, this is just another first date red flag. Regardless of what your stance is on any of these issues, if your date has an opposed view to them it could cause friction in the future. Try to make sure you are both on the same page for what is important to you.
He Brings Up An Ex… And Won’t Shut Up About Her
This is a major first date red flag! Are you kidding me? On the first date? I feel like everyone and their mother should know that this is neither the time nor place to explain that the reason you moved to the city is because you were following an ex. That you think your dog still misses her sometimes. But as if that wasn’t bad enough, if he starts comparing something about you to her, you know there is no way in hell that you should try continuing this relationship. He is obviously not over her. It’s real cute how his ex and you both have freckles. Fascinating. Don’t get caught up in feeling sorry for him because he can’t move on. Girl. Have some standards. You’re a queen who doesn’t need someone still hung up on someone else.
His Phone is Constantly Going Off— And He’s Checking It
Nope. There is a reason that staying away from your phone is on the first date check list. Your attention should be on the person you agreed to go out with. Family can wait. Friends can wait. Social media can definitely wait. If he can’t do you this one favor by putting his phone on silent or do not disturb or at least putting it face down so the notifications won’t be a distraction, then what would that mean in the future? Not only that, but if he actually checks his phone and is texting or updating his status while you’re trying to explain something about yourself, this is undoubtably a first date red flag. He should be both physically and emotionally present when you share important things with him on the first date.
Girl, you deserve someone who is going to pay attention to you, support you, and not be easily set off like a firework by the smallest incident. Be careful not to settle for someone just because you enjoy being in relationships. Yes, being with someone dedicated with you is amazing. But so is being single! Enjoy this time you have to spend with yourself and soon the person you want to be with (and who deserves to be with you) will come along.