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Meeting the Family

How to make a good impression while meeting the family….:)

You and your significant other have been going together for quite a few months. Now, the holidays are approaching, and you are invited to spend time with his parents at their house. There are some unspoken rules in this new addition to the dating game, and it is crucial to follow them. The better you follow them, the more points you can accrue.

Meeting the family

Tip # 1: Come Bearing Gifts

Meeting the family doesn’t have to be scary. Make a great initial impression with a small “thank you for having me over” present. It doesn’t have to be fancy presents for everyone inside the house. A simple house-warming gift will do. Flowers, chocolates, some vegan cookies. Anything that can brighten the place up, or let the family know that you are a thoughtful person. This is a kind gesture, and can immediately begin to put you in good standing with the mother.

meeting the mom for the first time

 

Tip #2: Be Conversational
When Meeting the family  it is very important to be conversational. Small talk might not be the most exciting thing in the world, but it is necessary to form a foundation. If you are social, feel free to chat up the mother about her latest happenings. How’s the yoga? How was her latest trip? What else has she been up to? If the father is around, you can engage him and see how he’s been doing as well. Chat up the siblings about the latest movie they’ve seen or book you’ve read. Share information, and this will strengthen the bond. If you aren’t as social, just being around them can be enough. You can edge into conversation if you’d like, and chances are that they will address you with various questions. Avoid being on your phone the whole time! This can seem like you are uninterested in them, and may make them feel as though they can’t engage you in their conversation. Try to stay present when you are around them. Be friendly and open. Stay keen and pay attention to certain traditions they may have, and be willing to be a part of them.

first impression

Tip # 3: PDA-Free Zone
The last thing a mother wants to see is a girl straddling her precious son whilst making out with him. Just because you’re a couple, doesn’t mean you have to graphically remind everyone in the nearest vicinity. Be very conscious of where you want to get busy with your significant other. Take care not to be too touchy-feely with your person. A butt-grab you thought was discreet may instantly make your girlfriend’s father close up like a clam. Keep it PG around the household, and save the romance for places away from judging familial eyes. Take a nice walk around town, go to the movies, take a nap together, or go for a drive somewhere. You don’t have to be holed up together the entire time. Keep the spark alive, but keep your hands to yourself around the parents. What you can do when you’re getting dinner ready or watching a movie with the family can be subtle but sweet. Touch your person’s arm softly, play with their hair, or gently stroke the back of their neck. You don’t have to be nuns and priests when his or her kid sister is around or judging grandmother. All you have to do is be thoughtful, aware, and conscious of your actions. And you just have to remember: The holidays won’t last forever.

Tip #4: How Can I Help You?
Meeting the family does not mean you get to sit back and let them do all the holiday work. When dinner is being prepared, be nearby in case an extra hand can be of use. Make sure you verbally ask them if they need help getting the food ready. Do vegetables need to be chopped? Does something need to be stirred? Should you change the heat of something? It’s always admirable to be eager to help. Even if they don’t need help preparing the food, you can put yourself to good use elsewhere. Locate the cutlery and plates and set the table. After dinner is finished, help clear away everything and wash up. Never let the same people who cooked do the cleaning. If there are some people who spent the past hour or two preparing everything in the kitchen, they deserve a break. Cleaning dishes won’t hurt you.

meet the parents

Tip # 5: Keep Your Distance
Meeting the family does not mean you need to be with them every second because everyone gets tired of specific people at some point. Just because you are your significant other’s family’s guest, does not mean you have to be all up in their grill 24/7. Surely, they need their distance just like you do. Retreat once in a while, and find your own space. This can help keep your positive energy intact, and ensure that you have your own hobbies and interests to tend to. Watch a movie on your computer, read a book, text your best friend about how crazy everything is here. Just don’t overdo it. Don’t make the family wonder where you’ve disappeared to for half the day, and also don’t be constantly present to the point that it seems you don’t have your own life. You don’t have to follow the mother or siblings around the whole day to get their approval. They will like you on their terms, and you have to just let it happen. In the meantime, chill.

Hopefully you can get through the holidays without it being a completely harrowing experience. I am excited for everything the holidays will bring, and I look forward to the new year. I trust you shall have a wonderful time with your person, and remember that love is very important to share. Learn to love your significant other’s family. Don’t put up walls with them. Be yourself. Your own wonderful, genuine, awesome self. Because that’s the kind of person they want to be with, the person they admire and adore. They want the best sort of partner. It’s up to you to show them that you are nothing short of amazing. So do what you do best! Stay awesome!

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